In the morning, I like to have my coffee in a quiet place while meditating or reflecting on the day ahead. That morning time is absolutely valuable. I am not the type of person to have my coffee “on the go;” in the car, while walking down the street, etc. Coffee has become a trigger for me to slow down; to stop what I am doing and think. Even in the afternoon, I won’t have coffee unless I can take the time to drink it. It civilizes my life which can often be hectic and chaotic.

I drink my coffee black. No cream. No sweetener. I like my coffee hot, not iced. (I do drink iced coffee on hot days, sometimes in the summer.) There is something about the warm coffee in my hand that reminds me that the warmth won’t last forever. So, enjoy this moment. It’s a kind of hourglass that gets set. When the coffee gets cold, the hourglass timer is up. It’s time to move on. I only have so much time. It’s a good life lesson, actually: Life is short. It doesn’t last forever. Enjoy it before it gets cold.

I do not like to read while having coffee. Knowing that there is a finite amount of coffee in the cup, and that the time that the coffee will stay hot is limited, reading is not a good use of my time. That coffee is a time for me to slow down, reflect, meditate, be calm, disengage. Reading, for me, is engaging. So, when I drink coffee while I am trying to read, my attention must stop – in medias res – and shift to the cup filled with liquid that I might spill, or burn myself on, or knock over. (All of which are very real concerns for me due to my clumsy nature.) The coffee, in this case, is distracting.

Coffee also affects my choice of food. The bitterness of the coffee pairs nicely with foods that are sweet: toast with jam, cookies, cake, chocolate, muffins. You get the idea. I will not have coffee with savory or salty foods. While I am eating while drinking coffee, my attention is on the pairing of the flavors. I am actually – actively – thinking about the flavor and texture of the food, and how it relates to the temperature and the flavor of the coffee.

Coffee is a linchpin for me, holding habits together in place that do not always help me. I think that I need to change my relationship with it. To be clear, coffee is not a bad thing. I know about the antioxidant qualities and that consuming it in moderation can help with concentration and weight-loss. This isn’t even about caffeine. This isn’t about it being “good” or “bad.” This is about identifying things in my life (which may be unique to me) that, although not bad in themselves, hinder my progress in any given area of my life. Coffee is one of these hinderances to me.

That all sounds great. And, it is. As much as coffee has become a trigger for psychological health, my physical health needs attention. I would like to start a habit of working out in the morning. This doesn’t mean giving up coffee, but it might mean giving up my morning ritual. So, my relationship with coffee is changing. It will always serve as a psychological reminder to slow down, to reflect and think about things. But, my morning needs to change to facilitate a path to physical health, too.